The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert.

After they got their tent all set up, both men fell sound asleep.

Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and

says, "Kemo Sabe, look towards sky, what you see? "

"The Lone Ranger replies, "I see millions of stars."

"What that tell you?" asked Tonto.

The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says, "Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning. Theologically, the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What's it tell you, Tonto?"

"You dumber than buffalo shit. It means someone stole the tent. "

......Or Can You?

1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.

2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

3. How about never? Is never good for you?

4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in

public. This is good!

5. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

6. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.

7. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.

8. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're

saying.

9. Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again...

10. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

11. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.

12. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

13. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an

artist.

14.  Any connection between your reality and mine is purely

coincidental.

15. What am I? Fly paper for freaks!?

16. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

17. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.

18. And your crybaby whiny-butt opinion would be...? BINGO!

19. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.

20. If I throw a stick, will you leave?

21. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.

22. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality. 

23. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?

24. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?

25. Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.